Three Easy Steps To A Happy Marriage (Part 2)

In yesterday's post, I wrote about how it was possible to have a happy marriage on two conditions. 

1. You release your spouse from the responsibility of making you happy. 
2. You stop pursuing happiness and find your identity and satisfaction in a relationship with God, through Jesus Christ.

Today, as promised, I would like to share with you three points of a wedding homily that I have to preach to myself almost daily.

Three Easy Steps To A Happy Marriage (Part 1)

The title of the post was just ridiculous enough to get you to come over here. Wasn't it? Sorry about that. The truth is that a happy marriage is not a worthy goal. To search for--to chase after--a happy marriage is to guarantee that you will never find it.

A happy marriage is not the goal. 

My wife, Melissa, and I just celebrated 13 years of marriage on the 6th of this month (June 2011, if you're reading this from the future). I always like to say that it's been the eight happiest years of my life. The first 5 years of our marriage, I couldn't say that we were happy. The reason for this is that we (OK, maybe just I) had an unreasonable expectation of what my wife could do for me. I thought that she could make me happy. Boy, was I wrong! Make no mistake about it. Melissa is a wonderful woman--a great wife and mother--but, even with all of her excellent qualities, she did not and does not possess the power to make me happy.